One common thing that I have discovered is that a lot of students tend to get into relationships in school once they’ve been admitted. Am not saying that it is a bad thing, so far it is a healthy one. Remember you are in school for a purpose and anything that will defeat that purpose should be thrown aside. If getting into a healthy relationship in school is gonna help your studies, no problem. I won’t tell you what to do in dating in school, but I will give you some fundamental reasonings and it is left for you to decide which is right for you. Enough talking!! In this article, I have compiled 8 things that you ought to know about your partner before you date him or her in school.
1 What kind of future does he/she crave for: Most ladies(if not all) want to live with successful men and most guys might want to live with responsible ladies in the future. But ironically, you are or want to date a guy who does not take his studies seriously, not that studying hard makes people successful. Its just that if one can’t take his/her studies seriously, then that person cannot be a responsible partner and I don’t think you want to date an irresponsible person(that’s if you are responsible yourself).
2 How he/she treats other people: Your partner may be nice to you, I mean helping out with your studies, finance or even standing for you in the public(that’s real cool). And you think you have found the right one, right? Wrong!! One other thing you need to check out is how your partner treat other people. Does he/she treat you nicely but speak rudely to his parents or slams down on the waiter when he is spilled upon? You might say that you don’t care because you are treated nicely. Well, I am sorry to say that you are sitting on a time bomb because he or she is just putting on an act which of course, would not last forever.
3 Compatible values: Once you get into a relationship, you become emotionally attached to such a person. What I mean is that whatever values he or she has can affect you. Its either you have the same behaviour/attitude or you adapt. At times adapting can result in personal conflicts because what you were brought up with what you are trying to drop. If you are a night student but your date is a night clubber and always want you around. Then you have to make a decision, but have it at the back of your mind that it shouldn’t be something that will affect your studies. At times, adapting can affect us psychologically, so my advise to you is to look before you leap.
4 How does your partner handle issues: Just because you couldn’t meet up with what both of you planned resulted in your partner not picking or returning your calls really shows immaturity. One way I use to view people is the way they handle situations. Your date should be someone that handles situations with responsibility and maturity. Although we are all humans and someone can get out of hand at times, but showing remorse or having the ability to apologise later shows that one is matured enough to be taken seriously.
5 Does he/she have an Ex and what was the reason for breaking up:This may not really be important, but it is vital. You may calmly or playfully ask the reason for their break-up. This will let you know the kind of person that you are dating and know what is and what is not expected of you. This will help you not plunging into something which you might regret later and get you all worked up. Take it from me, relationship should be the last thing that should get you worked up is school because your test and exam is doing press-up for you.
6 The people that he/she associates with: Remember somewhere in the bible that says bad association spoils useful habits and also the part that says “show me your friends and I will tell you who you are”. That’s just it. You wouldn’t want to date a guy that moves with cultists or a girl that moves with people involved in illicit activities, except you are a fan. Watch the people that your partner moves with because they can affect him/her which can in turn affect you. So just make the right choice.
7 What does your partner think of a healthy relationship: Does he/she thinks that a relationship is about giving money, helping out with each other’s problems etc. Knowing what your partner thinks of a healthy relationship will help you know if it is compatible with your own values ensuring you make the right decisions.
8 His/her relationship with God: I am not just talking about christians here, other religions are involved. If your partner is someone that takes his/her relationship with God serious, then that person is likely to take the relationship with you serious and also apply God guided principles that should be emulated in relationships that can only lead to tighter and a meaningful one, except the person is an atheist.
Dating someone in school is all about dating someone that can affect you and your studies positively. Someone you can learn from and not someone that will draw you away from your studies. What I want to pass across is that you shouldn’t just jump into relationships, access your partner before you guys start dating.